Through the Dark
by pinksheep1987
Summary: What could possibly be going through Arizona's head whilst in the on-call room with Lauren? This is currently a one-shot, with the possibility of extending to a multi-fic. Positive Laurzona piece. This is my first published fanfic - Reviews welcome :) Rating likely to change to M in future chapters All characters belong to Shonda and ABC.
1. Chapter 1

Arizona instantly felt like an idiot as she extended her arm to shake Lauren's hand. They had spent more time together over the last week than Arizona cared to admit. They'd had coffee. They'd had lunch. They'd performed an incredible surgery on a tiny human. They had a connection. They had become more than a handshake and they both knew it.

Lauren laughed incredulously at the gesture - a laugh that was also laced with hurt and confusion. Arizona withdrew her hand and laughed nervously as she considered a more fitting farewell. She sighed internally as she took a step forward into the inevitable - a tiny step that felt like an enormous leap into dangerous territory. Lauren mirrored her action and both women found themselves physically closer than they'd ever been.

There were no barriers now, no scrub masks to hide behind. It was just Arizona, and Lauren, in an on-call room. Alone. Before Arizona had the time to consider this fully, she felt Lauren's arms close around her, pulling her into a loose hug. She melted into Lauren as she felt the other woman's form against her own for the first time. Arizona embraced the embrace and allowed her hands to settle on Lauren's shoulder blades over her scrubs and lab coat. Both women inhaled simultaneously, the scent of the other making them heady. The feel of the slender body pressed against her own, combined with the smell of fresh soap and shampoo of Lauren's skin and hair made Arizona weak to her core.

She barely noticed the lights inside the on-call room flicker and dim, nor the door slam into its crane behind her before she felt Lauren's lips brush against her own. The contact was so brief and delicate that Arizona wondered if she'd imagined it. It was only the ache between her legs that co firmed the reality of the situation. Desire consumed her then as she felt her body respond to Lauren, crashing her lips against those of the woman who had invaded her every pore in less than a week - the woman who felt more like Arizona than Arizona did herself.

The kiss was frantic, yet tentative; full of emotion, yet void of any complication at the same time. Arizona grabbed at the back of Lauren's head, anchoring them together as the kiss deepened. Arizona could feel Lauren's need for her with every breath against her face, every delicate touch upon her burning skin. She sucked Lauren's bottom lip into her mouth and bit down lightly, which seemed to ignite something within the other woman, who growled and shuddered in appreciation.

Arizona searched for Lauren's face in the dark but was unable to find the features she was seeking - there hadn't been enough time for her eyes to adjust to the reduced light, and that produced by the raging storm outside was not adequate. Arizona didn't believe she could get any closer to Lauren than she was in that moment, until she felt Lauren's strong and capable hands roaming over her lab coat covered back and she thought she would die from desire. She felt Lauren's hands slowly moving impossibly lower until they rested on her ass. Arizona closed her eyes as her breathing quickened, relishing Lauren's touch.

The lights flickered and came back on and Arizona's eyes shot open. She was ready to keep falling into the eyes that met her own, eyes of the most intense hazel she had ever seen. Realisation hit Arizona in that moment - the eyes that held her own should not be hazel because her wife's eyes were unmistakably brown. Brown eyes that go so dark with desire you would be forgiven for thinking they were pure onyx. Those were the eyes that belonged to her wife. The eyes that belonged to Callie.

"I-I-uh- ... I can't do this." Arizona gasped as she tried to wriggle out of the clinch. She tried incredibly hard to eschew the utterly defeated look that washed across Lauren's features. Arizona felt like she was in complete turmoil. How could she have let it get to this?

"It was a pleasure to meet you," Arizona stated simply as genuine tears pricked her eyes whilst she turned and reached for the door handle. And it had been. Lauren had made Arizona feel alive from the moment she had picked up the wrong coffee cup at the cart on that very first morning. She was fresh, and inspiring and an incredibly well respected surgeon. She was everything that Arizona used to be. Not before Callie, but before the plane crash; before the day she lost everything.

She flinched at the thought. She was frozen at the door as she was momentarily transported back to the woods, screaming in pain as the life from those around her drained away into the dirt. Arizona Robbins, the good man in the storm died in the woods, and she had been nothing but an empty shell since. She lost control the moment the pilot did, and lost everything as a result. She lost her daughter's father, her courage and her sense of self which was bad enough. Then she lost her leg and with the loss of her limb came so much more - her confidence, her pride and her dignity, not only as a woman but as a surgeon. She lost valuable time with her daughter, and equally valuable time with her wife.

It was not the physical loss of her limb as such that was the issue - it was the association of the amputation with the loss of everything else. The association with Callie. Arizona was not dense - she knew that Callie made the decision to safe her life. Unfortunately, though, Callie's decision to cut off Arizona's leg left Arizona with a physical reminder of all of the things she had lost, and this is what hurt her the most. Arizona gulped back a lump of emotion as she placed her hand on the door knob.

"Arizona?" She heard Lauren growl from behind her, a guttural groan that was almost primal. She blinked back tears as Callie flashed through her mind once more, from the time in the elevator she had uttered Arizona's name in the exact same way that Lauren just had, after their separation over their differing views on having children. Yet another thing that Arizona had compromised on to be with Callie.

She prayed that Lauren would not say anything else as she could feel her defences crumbling just from hearing her say her name. She drew in a breath and waited for what felt like an eternity.

"You are allowed to lose a little bit of control."

And there it was. That one sentence that made everything crystal clear. Ironically, it was not about Arizona losing control at all - it was about gaining it. Lauren had allowed Arizona to make a decision for herself, and she was sure she had never in her life been as understood as she was in that moment. Lauren wanted her - not out of love because she was her wife, nor out of pity for her being physically disabled, but because she was Arizona Robbins. A sigh of relief escaped Arizona's lips as she flicked the lock on the door of the on-call room.


	2. Chapter 2

***A/N - I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read and review this story. It means a lot. sorry for the delay in posting the second chapter. Hopefully the next part won't take as long. If there are any comments, questions or suggestions feel free to let me know :)

Arizona stroked the handle of the door as she steeled herself. This was it. She had finally regained the control she had been craving for almost a year. How did whether or not to sleep another woman become the one choice she was allowed to make? She couldn't dwell on the facts or the reasons any longer. She spun herself around, blonde locks flailing with the motion. Her eyes locked on Lauren's and she inhaled deeply. She had felt an instant connection with the other blonde woman but this was the first time she had allowed herself to really look at her - like REALLY look.

Arizona felt her breath hitch as she studied Lauren's features properly for the first time. Until now, it had been all stolen glances and wry smiles behind scrub masks, careful not to give anything away to others, but simply prolonging the inevitable for themselves. Arizona was astounded by Lauren's beauty - she was utterly breathtaking.

Arizona felt herself move towards the blonde as if there was some kind of magnetism drawing her in. She was sure that she saw the corners of Lauren's mouth turn up slightly as she got closer. Without another thought, Arizona plunged her fingers into Lauren's golden locks and crashed her lips against Lauren's once more. Her lips felt incredible - soft, yet firm; unsure but purposeful. She felt Lauren smile into the kiss which encouraged her even more.

Feeling emboldened, Arizona lowered her hands, tracing the outline of Lauren's delicate ears, her well defined jawline and her slender neck. She soon hit an obstacle in the form of Lauren's lab coat. Arizona's hands made light work of this however, as she balled the white material of the collar into her fists and began to remove it from Lauren's frame.

Lauren assisted by shrugging her arms out of the coat and Arizona tossed it to the floor. Lauren's hands found Arizona's hips and she thought she'd found heaven. She was sure she had never felt anything like them in her life - they were so... Grabbable! She growled into Arizona's mouth as she sunk her fingers into the flesh beneath them.

"Dr. Boswell," Arizona murmured between kisses, "I didn't have you pegged as a 'hip gal'.."

"Well you know me, Dr. Robbins," she squeezed impossibly harder. "Always full of surprises." The ever seductive Lauren thrust her hips into Arizona for emphasis and Arizona felt her legs buckle at the sensation. Her lips were on Lauren's once more and she drove them towards the bed behind Lauren until the edge of the bed hit the back of Lauren's knees. Arizona played with the hem of Lauren's scrub top before attempting to pull it up over Lauren's head.

"Woah," Lauren whispered gently, reading the apprehension in Arizona's face. "Are you sure?" As much as she wanted Arizona, she was aware of her struggle. She wanted Arizona to feel good about herself again, but she didn't want Arizona to rush herself into another thing she wasn't sure about.

Arizona didn't want to hesitate. She wanted this. She wanted to see what was hidden beneath the scrubs; what was hidden beneath the slightly over-confident facade that the other woman wore. She wanted Lauren Boswell, and she was going to have her. She nodded at Lauren, and her eyes were the darkest shade of indigo Lauren had ever seen.

"Entirely," Arizona admitted as she proceeded to tug at Lauren's shirt. Convinced that Arizona was ready she allowed her, and began to relax. Arizona's eyes bore into Lauren as she discarded the shirt and reached for the hem of her own.

"Let me," Lauren husked as she stilled Arizona's hands with her own. Arizona flushed as she felt her arousal pool between her legs. She was a grown woman! How on earth was Lauren able to make her feel like a teenager again?!

Lauren took over and began to push the fabric of Arizona's scrub top up over her delicious body at an excruciatingly slow pace, fingertips trailing along the soft skin that lay beneath. Arizona felt her nipples tighten as she felt Lauren's fingernails lightly grazing either side of her bra clad breasts, automatically ensuring that Arizona raised her arms above her head.

Standing in nothing but her scrub pants and teal lace bra, Arizona looked Lauren up and down before letting her eyes rest on the other woman who was not, Arizona realised, wearing a bra - just a simple white vest that was leaving NOTHING to the imagination as hardened nipples began to poke through. Arizona stalked towards Lauren, placing her hands on the taller woman's shoulders, gently pressing down indicating that she wanted her to sit on the bed. Lauren obliged with a grin as she saw Arizona's nimble fingers untie the string on her pants.

"Off," demanded Arizona simply and she watched Lauren slide the blue material down her lithe thighs, revealing toned muscle extending from beneath a pair of red boy shorts. Arizona drank in the sight of an underwear clad Lauren leaning back on her elbows and closed the gap between them once more.

"You are an utter health risk," Arizona told Lauren as she pushed Lauren's knees together. She placed her right knee on the bed next to Lauren's hip for support as she swung her other leg to rest the other side. Lauren didn't want to make a big deal out of the whole prosthetic thing because it wasn't, but she also felt the need to reassure Arizona of this.

"Just let me know if you have any discomfort," she spoke gently as she sat more upright and caressed both Arizona's scrub covered thighs simultaneously with her fingertips. She didn't need to wait for a response from Arizona - she trusted that was enough. Her hands instinctively explored Arizona's body, tracing every reachable contour - the outward curve of her hip leading to the inward curve of her waist whilst she stretched her thumb across to the dip of Arizona's navel. She was eye level with Arizona's incredible breasts and needed more. Arizona felt her tongue leave a burning trail through the valley of her cleavage and both women suddenly became aware of their intimacy. Arizona felt Lauren's strong left hand close around the clasp of her bra and release it in one swift move.

"That was incredibly hot," Arizona gushed as Lauren's hand rested back on Arizona's hip, although a little confused as to why Lauren hadn't proceeded to remove the garment. Lauren blushed at the compliment before lust filled her eyes once more.

"Stop talking and show me," Lauren ordered, indicating that she wanted Arizona to reveal herself to her. Arizona raised her eyebrows as she held her loosened bra against herself with her left hand, and slipped the first arm out of its strap with the help of her right, before repeating the action with the other arm. A seductive grin spread across her face as she felt Lauren squirm beneath her.

A barely audible "Fuck," was all Lauren could manage as Arizona's breasts were finally released and Arizona's heart pounded as she felt the blonde devour her with her eyes. "You're so goddamn beautiful, Arizona," Lauren husked as she captured a nipple between her lips and Arizona cried out at the sensation. Lauren circled the nipple in her mouth with her tongue and gently flicked her thumb over the other. Arizona arched her back, feeding more of her breast to Lauren who suddenly bit down on the swollen nub. Arizona grabbed the back of Lauren's head, anchoring it to her breast, never wanting the feeling to end. Lauren released Arizona's nipple with a pop and Arizona groaned at the loss of contact.

"It's ok baby, you'll get what you want," Lauren soothed. "It's just that being a control freak, I need to be on top," she winked as she began to stand up. Arizona was dizzy with desire and needed to feel contact between her legs. She had wrapped her thighs tightly around Lauren as the taller woman manoeuvred them into a new position. Lauren could feel the sexual tension and Arizona's need for release and was certainly more than aware of her own.

Wasting no more time, she turned around and ploughed Arizona into the mattress. Arizona gasped in shock as her fervour reached intoxicating levels. Arizona reached out for the other woman.

"I need you, Lauren," she panted, almost pleading with those lust-filled emerald eyes. Lauren smirked, biting her own lip and crawling slowly between Arizona's thighs. As she reached Arizona's body, she stopped and sat back on her knees, admiring the insanely hot woman half naked before her.

"You do, huh?" Lauren teased as she pulled Arizona's hips towards her, so that they were slightly raised when her ass rested on Lauren's thighs. She held Arizona's gaze as she lowered her head and dipped her tongue into Arizona's navel. "Why don't you tell me exactly. What. You. Need?" She punctuated each word with a featherlight kiss along Arizona's taught abs, continuing to crawl up the exquisite body sprawled beneath her, causing her pussy to bump against Arizona's with every movement.

"Jesus, Lauren!"  
"Does calling two names mean you 'need' a threesome?" Lauren joked.  
"Just shut up and fuck me!"  
"Yes ma'am," Lauren complied with the request and sucked hard on Arizona's nipple, kneading the other with the palm of her hand. She had never been so aroused in her life. Arizona made her feel like she was on fire.

Lauren slipped her hand underneath the waistband of Arizona's scrub pants to meet the thrust of Arizona's hips. Arizona licked her lips as Lauren's vest covered breasts hovered just over Arizona's face. They were quite small but more than ample and Lauren was sporting the look that Arizona enjoyed more than almost any other on a woman, by wearing nothing but a vest top to cover them. Due to Lauren's slim frame her vest was incredibly tight across the soft mounds of flesh that were now inches from Arizona's hungry mouth. The material was pulled taught and Lauren's erect nipples were practically begging to be paid attention to.

As Arizona's teeth unexpectedly captured one of Lauren's fabric covered nipples, she almost collapsed on top of Arizona, pure pleasure shooting through her body. Lauren's fingers moved even lower inside Arizona's scrubs and soon found the crotch of her lace panties, drenched in her arousal. Lauren's eyes locked with the other woman's and she nearly came from that alone.

"Have I done this to you?" Lauren asked with genuine shock. It was all Arizona could do to nod the affirmative and Lauren couldn't help but grin. She applied some pressure to the sensitive bundle of nerves that she felt swollen beneath the lace. Arizona bucked in approval, encouraging Lauren's delicate fingers further south. Lauren slowly traced either side of the outline of Arizona's lips with her ring and index fingers and Arizona's head began to spin.

"Oh fuck!" is all that Lauren heard as she dipped her middle finger into Arizona's molten core. Sufficiently coated in Arizona's juices she retrieved her hand and sucked Arizona from her fingers. Arizona's jaw fell open - she had never seen anything as erotic as that in her life.

"Lauren, please," Arizona begged her lover. "Please fuck me." Lauren couldn't resist any longer. The sight of Arizona writhing beneath her at her touch, her taste and her intoxicating smell along with the expletives was an incredible turn on. She was going to make her moan. Lauren plunged two fingers inside of Arizona and and she yelped with pleasure.

"Dr. Boswell, I must say I'm very impressed with your bedside manner," Arizona gasped.  
"Well, I like to be thorough," Lauren played along in her low Southern drawl. She slowed the pace of her hand to curl her fingers against Arizona's walls, circling her thumb around her swollen nub, creating a new rhythm.

"You're going to make me cum so hard," Arizona whispered. Certain that Arizona was as close as she was herself, Lauren withdrew her hand, much to Arizona's disappointment. Her eyes widened in protest until Lauren removed Arizona's scrub pants altogether. She left the lace panties for some added friction which was never a bad thing. In one smooth move, Lauren also rid herself of her own underwear, leaving herself completely bare under Arizona's lustful gaze. Arizona was intrigued and whimpered for Lauren to resume her place between her legs.

Lauren pushed Arizona's legs apart and straddled her now naked left thigh. Arizona gasped as she rubbed her slick folds against her.

"This is how much I've wanted you since I saw you drinking my coffee," Lauren smiled. She adjusted her hips so that she was still straddling Arizona, but their centres were almost touching. She placed her hands on Arizona's hips, guiding them purposefully towards her. She parted Arizona's folds, marvelling at how soft the downy hair was beneath her fingers. Arizona's chest was heaving as she waited in anticipation. "Are you ready?" Lauren asked as she began to lower herself even closer. "Because I swear to god, Arizona, I won't last much longer.."

Arizona nodded, as her eyes locked with Lauren's. She felt the liquid heat of Lauren's core through the thin piece of lace separating them. Panting in unison, they built up a rhythm, bodies glistening with sweat and glowing with their imminent release.

"fucK! fuCK! fUCK! FUCK!" Arizona chanted with each thrust. She grabbed Lauren's hips and pinned them to her pelvis as Lauren gyrated against her a few more times. With that, the lace had been displaced and Lauren ground her own bundle of nerves against Arizona's.

"Jesus Christ, Arizona!" Lauren growled into Arizona's ear as she crashed over the edge, her orgasm exploding inside her, ripping through her insides and bringing Arizona with her. Arizona screamed her name so loudly that Lauren had to clamp her palm over her mouth in the hope of muffling the groans. She collapsed on top of Arizona in a sweaty heap as she awaited the arrival of her lover. They continued to gasp and twitch like that for quite some time as further, less intense but still enjoyable, waves of pleasure washed over them whilst the storm raged on outside.


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N: I just wanted to thank you all for your great reviews and messages-I wasn't expecting that when I published the first chapter! Anyway, I'm sorry for the delay in updating - you know how quickly time passes by. But I've got the next two chapters after this written out so updates should come quicker if I have enough interest. I hope you enjoy :) - J.J_

* * *

Lauren gently rolled off Arizona and lay propped up on her side beside her. Spotting a blanket folded up at the bottom of the bed she reached for it and carefully tucked it over Arizona's peaceful form, scooting under the bit that was spare. She remained on her side but snuggled as close to Arizona as was physically possible. Her right arm supported her head as her left hand snaked beneath the blanket and lazily traced gentle patterns over Arizona's incredibly soft skin. She studied her features and Arizona looked more at peace then than she had during all the time they had spent together until this point.

Lauren thought to herself how beautiful Arizona looked and wished she could eradicate all of the pain in the other woman's life. She couldn't bear the thought of causing her even more! The silver chain around Arizona's neck lit up in a particularly bright flash of lightning, but the charm had fallen back behind Arizona's shoulder. Lauren's slim fingers softly followed the chain until they discovered a solid chunk of metal which Lauren slowly retrieved, careful not to wake the sleeping doctor beside her. She held the heart shaped pendant between her thumb and forefinger trying to think why it looked familiar.

Rain pelted against the window and another flash of lightning accompanied a frighteningly loud crash of thunder as realisation hit Lauren - she had seen the very same necklace on Dr. Torres the day she and Arizona were planning the best approach for Tyler's surgery; the first time she was introduced to her lover's wife. She felt sick to her stomach and cursed silently to herself.

She felt Arizona stir beside her and she was instantly drawn back in. She was a physician - she would never willingly cause pain to another human being, be it physical agony or mental torture, and yet here she was lying in bed with another woman's wife after experiencing on of the most intense orgasms of her life! What on earth had she done?

"Hey you," she whispered as Arizona's eyes fluttered open. Even in the dark, those eyes shone like sapphires. Lauren had to push her feelings aside now for Arizona's sake. She had to be prepared for the hurricane of emotions that Arizona would undoubtedly have raging inside her.

"Hey," Arizona smiled sleepily, extending as many limbs as possible to wake up her muscles. She licked her lips and her mouth searched for Lauren's. Lauren was torn between wanting to do the right thing and wanting to taste Arizona once more. She was pretty sure this would be her last chance if Arizona decided she wanted to work things out with her wife and realised that the damage had already been done. Against her better judgement, Lauren allowed her lips to find Arizona's once more.

Bolts of passion surged through both women again, neither being able to control their urges for one another. Lauren could hardly believe it when Arizona's fingers grasped her own and guided them down her body, slipping beneath the waist band of the underwear she still wore. Arizona looked deeply into Lauren's eyes and bit her lip as she gently pressed Lauren's middle finger against her clit.

Both women suddenly froze as they heard the loud beep of Arizona's pager resonate throughout the on-call room.

"Fuck!" Arizona cried out in a strangled whisper. Lauren withdrew her hand, wet from Arizona's fresh arousal, and internally acknowledged that realisation had hit her like a two-tonne truck. Her heart broke as Arizona covered her eyes with her hands and took a deep breath. She exhaled slowly as if trying to compose herself and removed her hands from her face before sitting up and scrabbling around the bed. Lauren handed Arizona her bra without a word, figuring that is what she was frantically looking for. The two women exchanged glances that were sodden with guilt, overwhelming Arizona to the point of tears. She took the garment from Lauren and secured it around her body.

At the sound of her pager beeping again, Arizona stood up and retrieved the device from the pocket of her lab coat, knowing before she even read the display who the pages would be from. "Callie," she confirmed aloud, and Lauren nodded with wide eyes as Arizona turned her back to her.

"Are you okay?" Lauren asked, from beneath the sheet, knowing how ridiculous it sounded, but not knowing what else to say. She couldn't even begin to imagine what must be going through the beautiful blonde's head.

"Yeah, no the NICU is just understaffed and I should be there already," Arizona tried to act like nothing had happened, despite the fact she could still feel Lauren's touch lingering on every inch of her skin. She could not believe what she had done and was positive that she would have run home if there weren't babies that needed help. She threw on the first set of scrubs she could lay her hands on and tried to make herself look more put together on the outside than she felt on the inside.

"Do you need an extra set of hands?" Lauren blurted, before realising how suggestive it sounded out loud. She could have kicked herself, but couldn't help but smile at how easy and natural it felt to flirt with this woman despite everything.

"Oh no!" Arizona replied almost instantly as she turned back around to face Lauren, unable to get Lauren's hands out of her mind. They were delicate, but strong and skilled; soft but persistent. She remembered how they felt teasing her nipples, and then how her fingers found their way inside her and expertly found that sensitive spot... Arizona didn't think having Lauren's hands anywhere near her where she had to act professional would come to any good. "Please. Just... no."

In that moment, Lauren realised exactly how much Arizona was struggling, and also just how much she had fallen for the perky Peds surgeon. She watched, defeated, as Arizona grabbed her lab coat and hesitated in the very same spot, at the very same lock she had flicked just a couple of hours ago.

And in one swift move, Arizona Robbins was gone.


	4. Chapter 4

_A/N: As I have been so slow with the updates I decided to bypass everything in between as this is a Laurzona fic, essentially. So this is what happens after 'That Scene', so that the story can move forward. As always, thank you for the comments - any suggestions let me know :) - J.J_

* * *

Arizona stormed out of the Attending's lounge in which Callie, Meredith and Derek had set up some makeshift beds for the staff whilst the storm continued on outside. 'Apparently I lost you,' she mumbled to herself under her breath, echoing her wife's heartbreaking statement. She balled her fists as she walked as quickly as she could through the halls of GSMH. She was heading back up to Peds as she'd neglected everyone there enough already that evening and needed to restore some order in her unit.

"Arizona!" she heard Callie yell from behind her. It was inevitable that her wife would eventually catch up with her - Arizona's speed was limited by her prosthetic and Callie was an angry Latina on a mission. "Don't you dare walk away from me!" But Arizona didn't hesitate and continued along the corridor until she was almost back in the safety of her department. "Arizona!"

Callie was closing in on Arizona and reached out to grab her wrist. "We are not done yet!" Callie insisted as Arizona spun around to face her, their display having already caught the attention of some of the nurses and fellow surgical staff who were bustling around as they passed them.

"Yes we are Callie!" Arizona retorted. "At least for now." She lowered her voice. "People here are very sick," she tried to reason. "We can't talk about this now - or here for that matter!" Arizona stated looking around her and noticing that some of those around them were aware of the scene that was starting to unfold. What she hadn't noticed however, was that Lauren was manually bagging a baby who was situated next to the window of the ward and was consequently watching everything that was going on with a look of absolute horror on her face.

"Oh that's right, walk away," Callie persisted as Arizona turned away from her and headed to the entrance of the NICU. "I mean it's what you're good at, right?" Arizona tried not to let Callie's words affect her and she kept her stride, however Callie kept her pace behind her. "Where you gonna run to this time, huh?"

"No, no, NO!" Arizona stopped in her tracks so sharply that Callie almost ran into her back before Arizona turned to face her once more. "You do not get to bring Africa into this. I went there to fulfil a dream and YOU abandoned ME by making me feel guilty about going to do something I had always wanted to do and causing a scene in the airport!" The room had grown silent gradually as the two women slugged it out. "Of course we need to sort this out Callie, but right now I have patients to look after," Arizona reasoned.

"Oh, your patients!" Callie said as though she suddenly remembered where they were. "Yeah, Dr. Robbins here is verrrrrrry considerate to the needs of her patients," Callie addressed the room full of people wearing confused expressions on their faces which amongst the shocked parents of the sick children also included a number of their colleagues who had come to lend an extra hand.

"Callie.." Arizona tried to dampen the fire raging out of her wife with a pleading look, knowing where this could lead. She had hoped for a second that no matter how much hate Callie had for her she would never bring their personal life into such a public arena. However, she was also very aware that sometimes Callie was unable to control what left her mouth when she was this upset.

"You know," Callie thought carefully about her words as she clocked Lauren standing over an incubator next to the window. "It's just a shame that she didn't have the welfare of your children in mind a few hours ago when she was fucking Dr. Boswell here in the on-call room down the hall!" Callie's speech was measured and calm, and her eyes were fixed on Lauren's the entire time. All eyes were on Arizona as there was a collective gasp.

"Congratulations, Arizona," Callie's eyes focused on her wife. "You got what you always wanted." Arizona looked puzzled and her eyes asked Callie to clarify what she meant. "You never wanted kids - you no longer have one, and you also got the bonus prize of a girlfriend who is as selfish as you are." Callie's eyes brimmed with tears as her voice started to shake. "Looks like you hit the jackpot."

Arizona's mouth was agape as she watched Callie turn and leave the room. She looked across at Lauren as complete fear washed over her body and Lauren rushed to her side, gesturing for Karev to take over the baby she had been bagging. She placed her hands on Arizona's shoulders and told her it would be okay.

"Sofia," Arizona shook her head. "She can't take Sofia!" she cried as she fled the room after Callie. Karev nodded to Lauren that he was okay to oversee things whilst she went after Arizona.

"What the hell is going on in here?!" Bailey asked on entering the room, having just had Torres, Robbins, and the visiting cranio-facial specialist dart past her.

"You don't want to know," Karev replied as he assumed his position over the infant he had taken over from Boswell.

"Callie!" Arizona yelled after her as she headed to the elevators. "Callie!" She tried again but her calls were not acknowledged. Arizona stopped as she watched her wife board the elevator. Callie turned around to look at an exasperated Arizona as she waited for the doors to close. "Calliope, you cannot stop me from seeing our daughter!"

'Calliope,' Callie thought to herself as she remembered how good her name sounded on the lips of the blonde as she struggled to think of the last time her wife had called her by her full name. But she wasn't going to let that allow Arizona to get her way. Not this time.

"Our daughter?" Callie questioned. "Hmm," she looked directly at Arizona. "We never did get around to getting that piece of paper, did we?"

The elevator doors slowly concealed Callie from view and Arizona almost swooned. Lauren made sure Arizona was stable on her feet before rushing to the stairwell.

"Sofia is in day..." Arizona was cut off

"I'm on it!" Lauren called as the stairwell door swung shut behind her. Arizona steadied herself before making her way to the elevator to find her daughter.


	5. Chapter 5

_A/N - here's the fifth chapter! Thanks as always for the support and encouragement. Hope you all enjoy :) - J.J_

* * *

Lauren burst through the doors of the daycare suite to the sound of many screaming children and a rather fraught looking woman sitting at the reception.

"Can I help you?" the bespectacled woman asked abruptly.

"Rough night, huh?" Lauren asked softly with genuine concern. The receptionist responded to Lauren with a tired smile.

"Sorry," she muttered. "It's been a tough day. We're over capacity with all the children, and understaffed due to the storm."

"I get it, it's exactly the same in the NICU." Both women exchanged smiles. "Actually," Lauren started, pleased she seemed able to put the young receptionist at ease, "Dr. Robbins has sent me to check on Sofia."

"Oh, she's doing great!" Sarah - Lauren noticed her name badge - got to her feet. "I'll just go get her." Sarah hesitated, and looked a little nervous whilst eying Lauren up and down. "Y'know, I haven't actually seen you around here before?" Sarah asked quietly.

"Oh, no of course you haven't! I'm Dr. Boswell," Lauren proceeded to show Sarah her ID badge. "I've been working very closely with Dr. Robbins and Dr. Avery on a complicated case."

"Okay, sure," Sarah seemed satisfied and retreated into the play room. Lauren was slightly alarmed by how easy it was to collect a child and secondly that neither Callie nor Arizona had arrived there yet. She drummed her fingers impatiently on the desk as she looked around. "Here she is!" Sarah emerged holding Sofia by the hand. Lauren was struck by how beautiful the little girl was and how much she looked like Callie.

"Hey gorgeous girl!" Lauren addressed Sofia and the little Latina smiled shyly. Sarah lifted Sofia over the desk so that she was sitting on the counter. "My name is Lauren and I've come to take you to see your Momma. Would you like that?"

"Momma," Sofia echoed and her smile lit up her face. Lauren was already enchanted by the child and saw Arizona in her mannerisms.

"Okay," Sarah broke up the interaction. "I'm just going to need you to sign here," she handed Lauren a pen and directed her to an 'x' on a chart, "and you're good to go!"

"Alright," Lauren sighed, handing back the pen, surprised by how smoothly she had handled the situation. "You ready to go, little lady?" she asked Sofia as she sat her on her hip. "Thank you, Sarah," Lauren said warmly and was sure the young girl blushed.

"What the hell do you think you are doing?!" Lauren spun round when she heard Callie bellow down the corridor.

"Mami!" Sofia gurgled and reached out towards Callie who was approaching them at speed.

"Hi mija, Mami missed you today," Callie beamed at her daughter before turning to Sarah. "Could you please answer me as to why you have released my daughter to a complete stranger?"

"She told me that Dr. Robbins..."

"I don't care what she told you, you have failed to offer appropriate care for my daughter today!"

"Callie..." Lauren started.

"Excuse me, what?!"

"This wasn't her fault." Lauren gestured towards Sarah. "Arizona was scared, so I was going to take Sofia to her."

"That is totally irrelevant! Give her to me," Callie reached out for her daughter.

"You don't have the right to stop Arizona from seeing her baby!" Lauren protested.

"Seriously?" Callie looked at Lauren incredulously. "You have been here what, a week?" She narrowed her eyes at Lauren. "You have, in that week, slept with my wife, destroyed my marriage and consequently obliterated Sofia's stability." Lauren opened her mouth to respond but looked at the little girl before her and her heart broke. "She's already lost her father, and now YOU have stolen her mother," Callie continued. "Do you really think that gives you, or Arizona for that matter, any right to ANYTHING?!"

The reality of the situation hit Lauren then. What she and Arizona had done had caused real heart ache to real people. Innocent people. Callie had been right earlier when she called Lauren selfish. It was certainly true when it came to Arizona. She was blinkered in her actions and all she could see were those beautiful blue eyes and her lickable dimples. Lauren suddenly came to her senses. What she and Arizona had done wasn't wrong - it was the way they had done it. Yes they had hurt Callie, and that was unforgivable. This in turn would have a knock on effect on Sofia if Callie was threatening to stop her seeing Arizona. But it shouldn't be this way.

"Yes," Lauren replied simply. "If Sofia has already lost one parent, how could you even consider taking away contact with another?"

"Don't even try and put this on me!" Callie retorted in disgust. "She was the one not giving a shit about anyone but herself the minute she went into that on-call room with you!"

"She's grieving Callie! Physically, emotionally - she has lost herself! Parts of herself that made her who she was. Can you imagine what it would have been like to wake up after suffering like she had in the woods? But not only that, when she was trying to recover, she woke up another time and her leg was gone!"

"It's just a leg!"

"No, it's not. It helped her live her life. It walked her down the aisle to you. It ran around the park with Sofia. After you had the car crash she beat all the odds and helped you to wake up having not lost your child, despite Mark saying she was nothing!"

"She told you that?"

"She told me that when deciding the best way to treat you, Sofia hardly factored for Mark because he couldn't lose you. But she couldn't bear the thought of you having to cope with that loss when you woke up. Without Arizona, Sofia wouldn't even be here! You and Mark may have created her, but Arizona gave her life, and whilst, in whatever way you look at it, she is not the person you married anymore, she is as much of a mother to Sofia as you are. So yes, she most certainly does have the right to see her daughter."

Lauren swallowed and looked at Callie who had buried her face into Sofia's warm neck. She could see her shoulders shake as she tried to hide her pain from her little girl.

"Momma!" Sofia beamed and pointed at the door. Lauren and Callie both snapped their heads in the same direction to see a distraught Arizona standing in the doorway.

"Okay," Lauren broke the silence that had fallen upon them. "I'm gonna go head back up to the NICU to check on things there." Neither Callie nor Arizona responded to her but just focused on each other. "Arizona, we should be able to handle things for a while if you wanted to try and sort things out?"

"Okay," Arizona's eyes landed on Lauren's. They were sad but full of gratitude at the same time. Lauren couldn't figure why as she felt like she was at the centre of all this pain. "Page me if you need me?" Arizona asked softly.

"Of course," Lauren nodded and headed through the doors to the stairwell.

"You know," Sarah spoke up from behind the desk. "If you wanted to check Sofia back in whilst you talk, that would be more than okay.."

"You think you can manage not to hand her out to just anyone who comes to claim her next time?" Callie spat.

"Callie, lets just get on with this shall we?" Arizona walked towards her daughter in Callie's arms. "Hey baby girl," she beamed at Sofia. "Do you want to go back to play with Zola?" She asked the toddler having already spotted Zola through the door laying out a tea set on a tiny human sized table. Sofia giggled and reached out for Arizona. Callie resisted when Arizona tried to retrieve their daughter from her arms. Not to upset Sofia by struggling with Callie, Arizona tipped her head towards her little girl and inhaled deeply before planting a kiss on her cheek. "Momma loves you, Sofia.. Very much," she said seriously as she stroked her daughter's soft black hair that was just like Callie's.

"See you in a little while, mija," Callie said as she handed her back over the counter to Sarah before signing the chart quickly. She started walking down the corridor to find a room that was unoccupied. "Well, are you coming?" she looked over her shoulder at Arizona who was stood by the reception desk, whilst she opened the door of the room in front of her. Arizona simply nodded as she watched her wife enter the room down the hall.

"Good luck with that," Sarah offered.

"Thanks," Arizona replied weakly as she made her way to Callie. She steeled herself as she turned to close the door and took a deep breath. "Callie, I don't want to fight with you," she admitted, clearly exhausted.

"Good. Because I don't want to fight with you either," Callie looked equally drained and took a seat. Arizona followed suit and sat in a chair next to Callie. She smoothed a stray wisp of hair back out of Callie's face and looked intensely into Callie's eyes.

"I am so deeply sorry that I hurt you."

"I know you are," Callie replied genuinely as she fought the tears that once again threatened to fall from her beautiful eyes. "A-a-and," she said shakily "I'm sorry that I hurt you too."

"It's not your fault - NONE of this is your fault!" Arizona grabbed Callie's hands in hers. "Please know that," she whispered.

"But I made the decision to cut it off!" Callie couldn't stop the tears now.

"NO!" Arizona asserted firmly. It broke her heart to think that Callie was blaming herself for this. Arizona had to take responsibility for her own actions. "Callie, this isn't about you, or Lauren, or even the leg to a certain extent. This is about the fact that however we look at it, the plane crash changed ME - I am not the same person anymore, and losing my leg was another part of that and I was looking for someone to blame." She looked down at their linked hands. "I'm sorry that I blamed you. For any of this."

"Then why did you?" Callie asked, looking directly into Arizona's eyes. "You know I only made that decision to safe your life."

"I know," Arizona paused. "But that didn't - doesn't - make it easier to accept," she continued, honestly.

"And Lauren helped you? With that acceptance?"

Arizona had prepared herself for the discussion about Lauren, but it still took her by surprise.

"Honestly?" Arizona asked, tentatively. Callie nodded. "I was so desperate for things to get back to normal. I rushed myself. Back to work; back to you. I just wanted to forget it had all happened. I wanted to run around the park with Sofia without my prosthetic pinching at the skin left behind. I wasn't getting better quick enough, for me OR for you! I was so ashamed of my body - it made me feel weak, physically and emotionally." Callie winced as she tried to understand how Arizona must have been feeling. "How many times did I 'lead you on'? How many times did I let you think I was ready to be intimate again before closing you off like a frigid wife?"

"But then you WERE ready! And it was as incredible as it ever was!" Callie couldn't understand.

"It was incredible - you are incredible, Callie." The light in Arizona's eyes dimmed. "But the damage has already been done." She let go of Callie's hands. "I hated you seeing me like that - HATED it," Arizona seethed.

"But you were okay with Dr. Boswell seeing you like that?" Callie asked sadly.

"She reminded me of my old self," Arizona said simply without even having to think about her answer. Callie couldn't argue with that. She got it. She had even crushed on Lauren a little bit herself.

"So are you two a 'thing' now?" Callie asked sadly, looking down at her hands.

"I don't know, Callie." Arizona paused. "I think the only relationship I have room for at the moment is with myself." The room was silent for what felt like forever to both women, a somber mood shrouding them both.

"Do you have room in your relationship for Sofia?" Callie asked and Arizona's head shot up, eyes wide.

"Are you serious?"

"Of course. As much as I hate to admit it, Lauren was right. You saved Sofia's life and she loves you so much." Both women had tears in their eyes again. There was another brief pause. "You know," Callie started, " I would never really have stopped you having contact with her. I was just angry."

"I'd like to say I knew that, but I was worried for a bit back there," Arizona tried to crack a smile. "I guess I felt like after the hurt I'd caused you both I didn't deserve to see her.." Arizona began to sob.

"Hey," Callie said gently, putting her arm around Arizona comfortingly. "You are hurting just as much as any of us, Arizona. I can see that now."

"I will always love you, Callie. Always."

"Me too. And so will Sofia."

"So what happens now?" Arizona asked, sitting up and wiping her face with the sleeve of her lab coat.

"Well, Mark's apartment is empty..?" Callie suggested. "You'd still be close to work and just across the hall from Sofia.. But if that's a little close to home, then I'd totally understand," Callie added.

"No, that would be great," Arizona said looking into her wife's eyes. "Thank you, Callie."

"Sure." Callie got to her feet. "Okay, so I'm gonna go freshen up and head back to the pit. I'll take Sofia until you get settled in, but you know where we are.."

"Always," Arizona tried to smile without crying. Callie smiled back and opened the door.

"I hope you can work it out, Arizona. You deserve to be happy. We both do."

Arizona choked back the tears and nodded as Callie turned to leave.

"Yeah," she whispered to herself after Callie closed the door behind her.


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N: Hey guys, chapters are getting longer now, and I hope that this ties up the majority of the drama so that the story can move forward. A huge thank you for the comments and reviews and to the lurkers who are still reading this. Bring on the Laurzona fluff/smut :) -J.J_

_A/N 2: I had this written ages ago and didn't realise I hadn't posted it! Also, how did you all enjoy the premiere? _

* * *

"Knock knock," Arizona heard as a tapping at the door accompanied the words. She closed her eyes - this was all such a mess. The handle turned and the door began to open as Arizona looked up from where she was sitting to greet her visitor. Lauren's face appeared through the crack between the door and its frame. Despite everything, Arizona found herself happy to see Lauren. "Can I come in?" she asked.

"Sure," Arizona went to stand up, encouraging Lauren's entrance.

"Are you okay?" Lauren asked as she closed the door behind her and made her way to a tear-stained Arizona.

"I will be," Arizona sighed.

"You manage to have that talk with Callie?"

Arizona nodded and Lauren was pleased that with the confirmation. Arizona resumed her previous position in the chair she had been sitting in when Lauren arrived.

"Would you like to talk about it?" Lauren asked softly, kneeling in front of Arizona, resting her arms on Arizona's thighs. Arizona was shocked by how comfortable she felt with Lauren in such close proximity. She was pretty sure her marriage was over, in part because of what had happened with Lauren. She couldn't forgive herself for hurting Callie in this way, and whilst she was glad that she and Callie were able to have a conversation without ripping each other apart, she couldn't expect Callie to forgive her for this betrayal. And yet she found herself, again under the watchful gaze of Dr. Lauren Boswell.

"I would," Arizona whispered. "Just not right now."

"Well, I'd like you to know that when you ARE ready, I will be here," Lauren assured her. Arizona couldn't quite figure it out. This woman had actively pursued her, knowing that she was married, knowing that she had a child and a family. Yet despite knowing the heartache their encounter would inevitably have caused Arizona's wife, daughter, and to some extent Arizona herself by having to face the truth, she still felt an overwhelming sense that Lauren was genuinely concerned for her.

Despite all the flirting and lingering looks, Lauren had never pushed her into anything - she patiently waited for Arizona to go to her. Arizona wondered whether Lauren actually really did care for her? She was convinced that Lauren wanted Arizona to come to the decision herself about what she wanted from her life; about how she felt was the best way to proceed and start the healing process properly. She looked into the beautiful hazel eyes of this unlikely saviour kneeling before her and was grateful to Lauren Boswell. She was grateful that this stranger had appeared in her life and helped her to see that she couldn't go on living as she had been.

"Thank you," Arizona smiled.

"You're thanking me?" Lauren was puzzled.

"I am. I needed to accept that life has changed - I have changed," Arizona paused. "And I was in this place where I had a wife and child that desperately needed me to get better. Callie couldn't have done any more for me than she did. I had to suck it up and get on with it, but the truth is that I didn't know how! I needed to seek professional help and not be ashamed about it. I needed to ask my wife for help instead of letting it make me so bitter that I pushed her away!" Arizona cried as she let out far more than she intended. Lauren smoothed her hands up and down Arizona's thighs encouraging her to get this off her chest, not knowing when she would feel able to open up in this way again.

"It was Callie's right as my wife to help me through it, and I wouldn't let her! But instead, I gave away that right of hers, and I gave it to you!" Lauren's brow furrowed at the revelation but she asked no questions so that Arizona would continue. "And I know it's selfish, Lauren, I really do.. But everything was spiralling, and she was too involved. She was my doctor, my nurse..." Arizona paused once again. "And my wife; the primary caregiver to our daughter. I was too useless to help her with ANYTHING! Even when Mark died, I was useless..!"

"Hey!" Lauren couldn't stop herself any longer. "Don't ever say that, okay?" Lauren wiped the tears from Arizona's cheeks and held her face in her hands. "Useless is certainly not a word that could EVER be used to describe you, do you hear?" She looked directly into azure eyes and wished desperately to be able to drain away all the pain. "You are so strong, and incredibly brave. You're also too stubborn to admit when you need help, but that just makes you human, Arizona," Lauren soothed, working her magic again, like some kind of wizard.

"How do you always know exactly what to say?" Arizona sniffed.

"Hey, it's just the truth," Lauren held her hands up. "You didn't ask for any of this, and yet all of these feelings and emotions have just been thrust upon you. You're not weak for admitting that you need help, and you're not weak for admitting that the accident has changed you," Lauren continued. "It really sucks that Callie has ended up in the crossfire too, but I really cannot see how she is hurting anymore than you are right now."

"She did admit that she realised how hurt I must be too.."

"We'll that's good. You've both had your lives ripped from underneath you," Lauren said as she got to her feet. "Maybe one day you'll find your way back to each other?" she suggested quietly. Arizona looked puzzled, sure that she could see that longing in Lauren's eyes. "I just hope I haven't caused any irrevocable damage between you..?" She looked sadly at Arizona.

"Lauren," she said softly, as she also got to her feet. "I really hate to say this, but it's you that has made me see that life can be good again." Arizona took one of Lauren's hands in her own as the distance between them closed. "It wasn't fair on Callie for me to keep blaming her for any of this.."

"So I guess my timing just wasn't the best then, huh?" Lauren managed to smile, still a little unsure.

"I'm sure being the 'other woman' is as much fun for you as it is for me being the 'adulterous wife'," Arizona tried to reason. "But the fact remains, despite the cliche, that Callie and I have grown apart since that crash. And it's horrible to feel so detached from the woman you were convinced you were going to spend the rest of your life with." Arizona took a deep breath. "But that's how it is now. I only wish.."

"What?"

"I just wish that Mark was here. For Callie."

Lauren pulled Arizona into a tight hug. "She seems like she can take care of herself?"

"She's had this happen to her before," Arizona explained. "Not that I'm conceited enough to think that my betrayal would hurt more than the last, but she's gonna struggle with it, and she deserves better."

"I get it. The thought of losing you must be horrible," Arizona picked up on the subtext woven through Lauren's statement, "especially after what you've both been through. But she will survive this, Arizona."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because I've been where Callie is," Lauren replied simply. "And however much she's hurting, she will eventually realise the reasons behind it." Arizona looked at Lauren, intrigued by what her story could be. There was so much she didn't know about this woman, despite feeling like she'd known her all her life. "Besides," Lauren smiled, "she has that beautiful baby of yours to focus on."

"I melt whenever I think of her."

"She's a cute kid, I must admit."

"It must have been hard though, with Mark such an active part of your lives?" Lauren coaxed softly.

"At first, yeah. Mainly because Callie had slept with him when I was in Africa," Arizona responded. "But you know, he became almost like a brother to me."

"There you go," came Lauren's positive reply. "Look how that whole situation turned out."

"You really are incredible, Lauren," Arizona shook her head in disbelief.

"I'm just happy to help," she replied with a wink, and Arizona could have sworn she caught an ounce of flirt in the statement. Arizona silently acknowledged her gratitude for Lauren's calming presence with a smile, and hope shone across Lauren's face in return.

"So, I'm due to return home in the morning," Lauren said after a comfortable silence. "Should everything be ok with with the weather and the Sims baby.." She waited for a response from Arizona as a look of distress washed over her beautiful features.

"I hadn't even..."

"I know," Lauren understood that Arizona wouldn't have considered her departure after everything that had happened within the last 12 hours.

"You can't seriously be thinking of flying if the storm doesn't subside?" Arizona was genuinely worried for Lauren's safety.

"We'll I'd like to think the airline would use their professional judgement as to whether it's safe to fly or not," Lauren teased.

"Oh.. so you are definitely leaving. Imminently?" Arizona dropped her gaze and Lauren felt a tug at her heart.

"Arizona, please trust me when I say that I wish I could stay here with you, but.."

"There's always a 'but'," Arizona half smiled.

"I just think you need time for you, without the added complications of.."

"Of what?" Arizona cut her off, curious as to her response.

"Of us.. Whatever 'us' is." Lauren touched Arizona's face and held it securely between her soft hands. "I already told you - I like you. A lot." Both women smiled at the mutual feeling. "I just think it would be beneficial for you to discover who the new Arizona Robbins is, so that you can get on amicably with Callie, and be the mother you want to be for Sofia."

"You seem to know what I need better than I do right now," Arizona almost joked.

"That doesn't mean we can't chat! I'll be here whenever your want, if you even 'want' at all..?" Lauren was a little worried by what Arizona's response would be.

"I'd like that.." Arizona confirmed. "A lot," she smiled, playing on their earlier conversation.

"Wow, those dimples are to DIE for," Lauren couldn't help herself.

"You'd know, being the craniofacial specialist," Arizona said with a blush. Lauren just smiled back and shrugged, enjoying their comfortable banter. "So, do you wanna get coffee tomorrow before you leave for the airport?" Arizona asked, looking shyly at Lauren.

"Sure," Lauren agreed after a slight hesitation. She wasn't doing anything wrong - she elected to give Arizona space and time. But she knew one thing - in whatever capacity, Arizona Robbins was part of her life now and she couldn't be happier about that.


End file.
